A Demon's Heart

Last Tuesday Mia poured out her soul out to everyone explaining why she decided to step back from A Demon's Heart. Today I share my choice on what to do with this project. It's with a lot of thought, consideration, and discussion with people I trust most, that I have come to the choice to shelf A Demon's Heart until further notice. I'll break down my reasoning for you.

Personal: This is a project that Mia and I started on together, it was supposed to end that way. I do not feel right putting only my name on it and being the only one to profit from it. I don't feel that it's morally right, nor do I feel that Mia doesn't deserve to be on the cover. There was a lot of thought and debate that went into the pros and cons of what doing that would be.

Business: Before Mia had come to me to discuss the future of A Demon's Heart, I had brought up that I wanted to switch it to my other name. A.L. Kessler because it fit that branding better. However, the release date that I was working on for A Demon's Heart would come right after I released another first book in a series. (Which puts me up to 3 Series under that name) I felt that I could not do ADH justice by adding it as another series under that name, especially with releasing it so close to the other one.

Conclusion: ADH is being shelved. I'm not giving up on it completely. I will probably pull it out some type next year and see if it's still relevant and see what Mia wants to do with it. This was not an easy choice to come to, but I feel that it is a right one. I respect Mia's choice. My two biggest disappointments coming out from this was: it was my first truly co-written book and I was excited to see how it would have done and that it was my second attempt at something for SPE. (In Black and White (now Black and White Desires) was my first, but because of contracts, EC picked it up.)

SPE will continue as normal next Wednesday.

Know When To Walk Away

Sometimes we have to make hard decisions. Tough choices that hurt or might hurt others. It’s one of the suckiest things about being an adult, but it has to be done. It is what it is. It sucks, sometimes you want to cling so tightly to something because it is a part of you, but if you step back you realize that this idea you are holding onto might do better without you... So you have to move on, let it go, and realize that everything is going to be okay... Everything is going to be okay.

Don’t worry, I’m not going to break out in song like some inspirational Disney movie. Just busting out some hard self-truths. When I was little one of my favorite songs was The Gambler by Kenny Rogers. 1978’s wisdom still rings true today.

“You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em
Know when to walk away and know when to run
You never count your money when you're sittin' at the table
There'll be time enough for countin' when the dealing's done”

I don’t like to give up, I try not to make it a habit, but there are times when you gotta know when to walk away. I have been working on a project co-writing A Demon’s Heart with Alexandra, we’ve talked about it here occasionally so it would be shady if I didn’t address the changes that are taking place behind the scenes and what has changed for the book.

Full Transparency:

We started this project as our NaNoWriMo project last November. The main male character was a character I’ve wanted to write for a long time. I have a huge obsession with the last Russian Royal Family, Rasputin is by far one of my all time favorite real-life villains, and I was excited to tell their sides of a story that I have had bits and pieces of floating around in my head for years. But 10 days into November my world fell apart. Quite literally the life I had known for 12 years came crumbling down one Sunday morning. Life shattered and the other half of my heart walked out of my house in handcuffs.

I cried a lot. And no, I’m not going into all the details of what happened then or what is happening now. But I am explaining this so that you will maybe somewhat understand where my head has been for the past six months. Those first few weeks were complete chaos and fear. I had no idea what I was going to do, how my kids and I were going to survive while the rest of our lives were held in limbo. I couldn’t write. I had been working on two projects: Steamworks and A Demon’s Heart, and dabbling in Waking Up In Chains when all of this happened. Every time I opened scrivener to try to work on them afterwards my hands would shake, full on panic attack would set in, I would just look at the screen, cry and hyperventilate.

But I am prideful. I am a people-pleaser. Co-dependent. Whatever you want to call it. So starting in mid-December through February I pushed myself to try to help finish ADH with Alexandra, but behind my computer screen I was a mere robot and in order to get any words out for this story I had to simply cut off my emotions and the end result (from my prospective) is a very forced and unfocused piece of writing on my end (and I am only speaking about the parts I wrote and how I feel about it). It was hard, my head wasn’t in the right place. If this were a solo project I would just shelve it because it’s too raw of a pain for me to look at, but this is a co-writing project, therefore shelving it isn’t an option.

The only option (for me) was to look at what was best for this project and for Alexandra. My decision was to take my name off of it. A lot can be fixed in editing but all in all, me not being attached to this project is what is best because I can not heal if I have to constantly look back at what I was working on when my old life came tumbling down. It just rips the scab off of the wound and starts to bleed again.

My life being in shambles wasn’t the only reason I made my decision. I also feel like I don’t have enough fans to help drive sales, this type of book will benefit being under one author’s name and a name that has more of a following. That’s just smart marketing tactics. Some readers of one author might have too much of an emotional attachment to their “author” and wouldn’t want to dip their toes into something new. We all know that feeling, you have your favorite pair of shoes, they are comfy and broken in, it almost feels wrong to slip your feet into some new, unknown pair. Secondly, because of my robot-state I don’t feel like I contributed much to the story, sure the Alexei parts and Rasputin parts are there but all in all, I don’t feel like my contribution deserves my name on the cover or any part of the profits. And third, the books POV should be considered. And that is everything I took into consideration, but mostly, it was how I feel, in my heart. This project is just too much for me to deal with while I am still mentally healing and sorting out this new life which to be honest comes with a steep learning curve for everyone involved.

Now other changes that will happen I will leave to Alexandra to explain if she wants to, as is fitting, this is her ship to sail and that is her project.

I am sad, sad that my vision of character ideas I’ve had for a long time won’t be mine, but one day when the past doesn’t hurt I suppose I can look back at that and maybe enjoy the fact that there are bits and pieces of me that might have remained (after some heavy editing LOL). So bottom line is: Sometimes you gotta know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em. Know when to walk away, and know when to run.

So this is me “folding” for now. Other projects (ones started while my head and heart have gotten a bit clearer) are in the works. I have not given up on writing. But I am smart enough to recognize when something isn’t good for my soul. And right now, in this moment, this project isn’t good for my soul. And in related news, Steamworks is shelved indefinitely. My path isn’t set in stone and can’t be defined by what other people choose to do. I walk my own path and sometimes that path needs to be cleared of the rubble and debris; and other times I have to veer off that path and start blazing a new one.

If there is one thing I hope you take away from this post it is this: Do what is best for you. Find your bliss, follow your heart, but don't get so bogged down by "what you think you should be doing" that you make choices that aren't in your best interest. Be brave enough to be kind to yourself. Sometimes that is the hardest lesson for us to learn.

Two Short Stories & Alexandra's First Release

Both Alexandra and I had written up short stories with criminals as the main protagonist and both stories had the theme of being held captive. In the end our original plans for the stories didn't pan out so we thought, "hey we should combine them into one book and self-publish it." And in the end that is what we did.

So first off congrats to +Alexandra Webb on her first official release! She has two books coming out later this year from Ellora's Cave but this short story will be her first published work under this name.

Second, we don't do a ton of self promotion here but every once in a while it doesn't hurt to toot your own horn. If you enjoy erotica and are looking for a quick read come and check out Criminal Behavior when it releases on Friday. You will be able to find it on Smashwords and on Amazon.

We hope you enjoy reading them as much as we enjoyed writing them. And remember, word of mouth and reviews help indie authors so if you like what read please tell a friend, recommend it, and leave a review. We really do appreciate it.

Add Criminal Behavior to your Goodreads shelf!

The next SPE project

So as we all know, my SPE project got derailed because of a contract, but today I'm here to announce that Mia and I have been working on another SPE project. The twist? It's co-written by the two of us. Let me tell you that this was an amazing adventure and though we still have a bit of finishing up to do and a lot of editing. I'm super excited to get this project out to our readers. So you may be asking yourself, Co-writing? Really? Why?

Well, other than the fact that Mia and I enjoy each other's company and work great as a team, cross promotion is the why. We both have something to gain from this. Mia already has her first book out (Waking up in Bedlam) and her second book (her first book published with Ellora's Cave: Twisted Revenge) will be out Feb 26. Releasing a third book will help her sales on all points. It's a number game, really. I stand to gain from it because it'll help get my Alexandra name started, since I'm waiting on my two books with EC to release.

Cross promotion is something that was spoken highly of at IRC and Mia and I have since been trying to use it to our advantage. Under my other personality, I have a sample of Waking up In Bedlam in In the Light of the Moon to help Mia, and she has one in Waking up In Bedlam for me. Has it worked? I don't know, I haven't sat down to crunch the numbers, but more exposure is good.

Okay, so you're co-writing a book. So which one of you actually wrote it?

We both did. We divided the work up in a way that worked for us and our writing schedules. There are scenes we wrote together that will be edited to smoothly fit into the flow, there are scenes we wrote on our own. We will both be editing so that everything flows and our writing styles mesh a bit more. We work as a team, there is communication, discussion, planning, plotting and fun.

So there you have it, the next step in the SPE project! Can't wait for you guys to read this book.

The challenge of pricing your book, plus an announcement.

So several times over this last week posts have come up talking about how to price your e-book. There are a bunch of articles out there, a bunch of suggestions and you'll hurt your brain when you try to make heads or tails of it. So what do you follow? What article do you believe. Why is something working for someone else, but not you?

So many questions, and yes we're all lost in a sea of doubt when this comes up. As Mia prepares to release Waking Up in Bedlam it's something her and I discuss quite often. So here's my advice to you, from the research and reading I've done, it's a trial and error kind of deal. According to the Indie Romance Convention Blog, there's a formula that should help with pricing your book. According to Molly Greene, it's all about hitting that sweet spot, but it's still different for every person. When you talk to some authors they'll tell you they sell all e-books at $0.99 and that it works great, others will tell you that it doesn't work so well.

From what I've gathered $2.99 is the sweet spot for novels and novellas, $1.99 or FREE is great for short stories. Running a free short story as the start of a series seems to be a pretty popular choice. Many people say avoid $0.99, but why? So many authors do that, hell there are authors that offer entire collections for $0.99. Now, a $0.99 promo is different that a $0.99 continuous selling price. Here's the deal, $0.99 can still be associate with crap. Stuff people just throw up there to see if they can make a few sales. Check out the IRC blog for a great analogy about dollar store steak. (Which, for the record our dollar store here does, indeed, sell steak.)

Here's the deal, fellow authors and aspiring authors, don't sell yourself short. We all struggle with doubt, and wonder if someone would even be willing to buy a book for $2.99 from an unknown author, a new author, anything like that. But you have put your blood, sweat, and tears into your project. You are worth more than $0.99, all indie authors are. Don't let yourself get lost in that sea of $0.99, and it's never too late to change that price. So if you're floating around, go play with your prices a bit and see what happens with your sales!


Now time for the announcement. As we all know Mia's book is coming out next month (yay!!!) which probably brings to question when my book will be coming out. This was supposed to be a journey together, and it will be, but because of other unforeseen circumstances the publishing path for Black and White has changed. It will be published with Ellora's Cave, I can't really go into details as to why or how this came about, but I assure you that I have the Indie publishing experience to continue to help Mia with this blog and now I can start to offer a view point in comparison when working with a publisher. So please bare with us when things start to shift around here!